under the rug. And the wall around
the;child’s;heart;becomes;a;mighty;for-tress. No one can enter. And when this
happens, what do we do as mamas? We
might begin to build fortresses around
our own hearts.
I call this reverse RAD (reactive attachment disorder). So often, adopted
children are diagnosed with RAD, and
then the mother develops it too. I want
to share a powerful Scripture with you. It
is so powerful that I truly believe it sheds
much;light;on;the;adoptive;mom’s;heart.
“A new heart also will I give you, and a
new spirit will I put within you; and I will
take away the stony heart of your flesh,
and I will give you an heart of flesh” Ezekiel 36: 26.
Our hearts can so easily be turned into
this heart of stone. This not only affects
our own ability to love and see clearly,
but it affects our marriages, our relation-
ships with our other children, and even
our friendships because we have a ten-
dency to isolate ourselves if we believe
“no;one;understands.”;A;heart;of;stone
is a heart that is cold. It is also hard—so
hard that nothing can cut through it. The
heart of stone is dead. There is no feeling
in it, no tears of sadness or pity; it does
not bleed. The heart is lifeless; it has no
softness to it. It is incapable of sensing
another’s;feelings.
Charles Spurgeon describes the heart
of;flesh;well:
“It means a heart that can feel on ac-
count of sin—a heart that can bleed when
the;arrows;of;God;stick;fast;in;it;;it;means
a heart that can yield when the gospel
makes its attacks—a heart that can be
impressed;when;the;seal;of;God’s;word
comes upon it; it means a heart that is
warm, for life is warm—a heart that can
think,;a;heart;that;can;aspire,;a;heart;that
can love—putting all in one—a heart
of;flesh;means;that;new;heart;and;right
spirit which God giveth to the regener-
ate.” 1
Our hearts have to be filled with a
tenderness toward our child that only
God;can;pour;into;us!;We;have;to;look
at;our;brokenhearted;child;and;realize
that their acting out, their rejection, their
pushing away of every attempt that we
make;to;draw;them;near;is;not a personal
attack;against;us!;It;is;a;deep;pain;that
exists inside of them.
Moms, please understand that you
need;to;ask;God;for;this;heart;of;flesh.
You need to feel the tenderness and love
that God feels toward your child. Stop listening to the father of all lies. He wants
to see you defeated and torn down. Satan
wants to claim the orphaned children for
himself. Many have had so much abuse
that their hearts are wide open to the father of lies. This is a spiritual battle for
your;child’s;soul.;Each;day;you;must;suit
up with the armor of God. (Ephesians
6: 10-20);Become;a;mighty;mama;war-
rior for your child! Each stony layer of
the heart must be removed one at a time.
Hope must never be lost. Remember that
love;never;fails;(I;Corinthians;13: 8).
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When you begin to see
your child with a heart of
flesh,;the;way;God;sees
him, you will begin an
entirely new journey.