mother,;and;take;our;frustration;out;on
the;kids.;After;all,;they;don’t;seem;to;care.
And;they;should;care,;because;we;are;do-ing;this;all;for;them.;Is;it;too;much;to;ex-pect;that;they;would;at;least;pull;in;the
same;direction?
So;we;yell;at;them—
out;loud;on;occa-sion;;in;our;hearts;continually.;And,;in
the;terrible;silence;that;follows,;we;come
face;to;face;with;yet;another;failure.;Not
only;have;we;failed;at;school;adminis-tration, curriculum design, and teach-ing;;we;have;failed;at;parenting;as;well.
Not;only;have;we;failed;to;give;them;the
schoolroom;lessons;they;needed;;we;have
also;failed;to;provide;them;an;example;of
godly;character—of;patience,;kindness,
and;self-control.;Not;only;are;they;go-ing;to;grow;up;illiterate;and;unprepared
for;the;world;;they;are;also;going;to;bear
for;our;sake;the;punishment;of;God,;who
promises;to;visit;“the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and
fourth generation” (Exodus 20: 5).
In;these;times;of;real;anxiety,;we;find
profound;relief;in;the;dénouement;of;the
story;of;Harriet;and;her;mother.;As;soon
as she regains her composure, Mother
immediately regrets her outburst and
apologizes;to;Harriet.;“I’m;sorry,;too,”;she
says;wearily.;“I;didn’t;mean;to;yell,;and;I
shouldn’t;have;done;it.;But;sometimes;it
happens,;just;like;that.”
Here’s the encouraging part: Harriet
understands! For the first time in the
story,;she;relates;to;her;Mother,;person
to person, and responds in kind: “Big
mess,”;she;says.;“Really;big;mess,”;Moth-
er;agrees.;And;then;they;both;begin;to
laugh.;They;spend;the;last;moments;of
the;story;acting;out;their;love;for;one
another,;laughing;about;their;experience
and cleaning up the feathers together.
Their;relationship;is;restored—or,;more
accurately, established—by Mother’s
willingness;to;be;a;failure.
This;story;reminds;me;that;my;crea-turehood,;with;all;of;its;limitations;and
sins,;is;the;one;thing;I;have;in;common
with;my;children.;We;are;failures,;all;of
us,;and;it;is;only;in;our;sin;that;we;can
really;relate;to;one;another.
Think;about;the;story;again;for;a;min-ute:;what;kind;of;relationship;with;her
mother;did;Harriet;enjoy;while;Mother
was;trying;to;model;patience;and;self-control?;Not;a;very;good;one,;unless;you
count;irritation;and;neglect;as;love;and
concern!;It;was;only;in;mutual;confes-sion, repentance, and forgiveness that
they;loved;each;other,;and;these;things
came;in;on;the;heels;of;Mother’s;temper
tantrum.
If;I;present;myself;to;my;children;only
as;an;example;of;Godly;character,;they
will inevitably conclude that we have
nothing in common. If, on the other
hand,;I;share;my;own;sins;with;them;and
walk;in;repentance,;they;will;see;not;only
that;I;am;a;creature;as;they;are,;but;also
that;I;am;the;same;kind;of;creature,;with
the same specific weaknesses. It turns
out;that;the;dire;warning;of;Exodus;20: 5
might;actually;be;a;blessing,;rather;than
a;curse!;How;much;better;for;my;sons;to
share;my;own;sinful;tendencies,;than;to
struggle;with;others;to;which;I;cannot
relate?;Our;shared;sinfulness;is;a;built-in
platform for establishing real relation-
ships—a;gift,;indeed,;from;God.
The;good;news;is;that;because;of;Jesus’
success,;you;are;free;to;fail.;Because;you
are;the;one;that;Jesus;loves,;you;are;free
to;fall;into;the;sins;and;character;flaws
you;inherited;from;your;fathers;and;can-not;avoid;passing;on;to;your;children.
You;are;free,;in;so;doing,;to;avail;yourself
of;the;mercy;that;only;comes;to;sinners,
and;to;stand;with;your;children;on;the
ultimate;common;ground:;as;objects;of
the;undeserved,;unfathomable,;and;un-ceasing;love;of;God.
Adam Andrews is the Director of the Center for Literary Education and a homeschooling father of six. Adam earned his
B.A. from Hillsdale College and is a Ph.D.
candidate at the University of Washington.
He and his wife Missy are the authors of
Teaching;the;Classics, the popular reading and literature curriculum. They teach
their children at home in Rice, Washington. For more information, visit www
. centerforlit.com.
www.TheOldSchoolhouse.com;The;Literary;Homeschooler;•;January-February;2014;49
This;story;reminds;me;that;my;creaturehood,;with
all;of;its;limitations;and;sins,;is;the;one;thing;I;have;in
common;with;my;children.
yrotsiH... Do we have History Backwards?
TruthQuest
HISTORY