The Old Schoolhouse Magazine

times they would take it upon themselves to see to his comfort while I was busy seeing to theirs by preparing dinner, doing laundry, or doing any number of other daily tasks that make a household run smoothly and efficiently.

Of course, there were times— particularly when we were unable to attend some event or function because of Justin’s limitations—that I felt that perhaps my “normal” children were made to suffer because of the daily challenges of living with a special needs sibling. Sometimes I worried that because Justin’s care consumed so much of my time, I was not able to give the amount of time I wanted toward their education, but I was often reminded that they were learning lessons in compassion and self-sacrifice that were perhaps more valuable than anything they might learn in books.

Although life sometimes seemed unfair, I never allowed them to use their brother as an excuse to feel sorry for themselves. Sometimes we would have to look hard to find something to be grateful for in each situation, but a grateful heart is a thankful heart and self-pity never survived long in an attitude of gratitude.

It was true that our family was “ different” because we had been blessed with a special needs child, but when we gathered together at night to read, pray, and enjoy one another, we didn’t consider ourselves to be different—we considered ourselves blessed. We often talked about the unique opportunities Justin provided

. . . Self-pity never
survived long in an
attitude of gratitude.

for our family. Specifically, I would point out to Jennifer what a blessing it was that Justin’s handicaps prevented her from the usual doting and indulgences that may have come her way as the youngest and the only girl, and that by serving Justin, she was developing a sweet and tender spirit that was willing to serve. Or I would remind them that Justin often prevented us from over-committing ourselves to outside activities and the stress that might accompany those commitments. Once we began to name our blessings, it was usually easy to think of many.

Sometimes, however, it was difficult to find good in a situation, but we were careful to keep in mind that we served a sovereign God who worked all things together for good even when we couldn’t see the good. We remembered that God had uniquely placed each child—and each parent—in our household for a purpose and that the experiences and challenges we faced within our household served to grow and prepare each of us to glorify Him.

Sheila Campbell began homeschooling in 1991, and after the death of her husband in 2001, she homeschooled as a single parent. She also was the parent of a special needs child whom she cared for at home until his death in 2004. These difficulties have strengthened her walk with her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and it is her prayer that her words will encourage and inspire others. Sheila resides in Hale Center, Texas, and recently left her job with the Texas Home School Coalition to pursue her writing goals. Sheila invites you to visit her blog at pausingtopraise . wordpress.com.