Sadly, most dads feel like failures and bad leaders. This is the feedback we recently received from our reader survey. You need to know I work
for a non-profit fatherhood ministry called
Manhood Journey. Our goal is to help fathers build the next generation of godly
men. Our readers aren’t perfect, but it’s
alarming to think well-meaning and mostly
church-going dads are walking around feeling like bad leaders or worse, like failures.
This should not be.
As you read this post, think about yourself, assuming you’re a dad. If you’re a wife,
please consider passing this article to your
In our survey, we asked several questions,
one of the main ones was, “What is your sin-
gle biggest challenge as a father today?”
The answers ran the gamut. Funny. Seri-
ous. Passionate. Guilt-ridden. Stressed-out.
Here’s the no-brainer: fathers are strug-
We shouldn’t be surprised by this feedback. After all, the enemy lurks around
seeking to kill, steal, and destroy. If he can
get the father, he can often take down the
Grab the report here: info.manhood
We hope it helps you:
• Understand the heart of dads inside the
• Encourage the dads who struggle.
Consider ideas for how to manage
Challenge #1: Dads struggle with
communicating and connecting
with their wife and kids.
This was the most prevalent theme from
our dads and came out in several ways.
From feeling like they aren’t doing enough,
to feeling like they’re “losing” the battle for
their children’s hearts, to those who just can’t
seem to “make” their children open up.
The way one dad said it was, “I wish we
had the type of relationship in which I could
speak into his life.”
What Dads Can Do
We don’t claim to have a perfect fatherhood
formula. At the risk of oversimplifying,
here are a few ideas we would encourage
you to consider if you struggle with connecting with your family:
1. Admit your mistakes and offer apologies, frequently.
2. Stop trying to “be God” to your children; instead, reflect His character.
3. Stop trying to compare yourself to the “
perfect” dads around you; they’re a mirage.
4. Don’t wallow around in your failure;
move on. Romans 8: 1 says, “There is
therefore now no condemnation to
them which are in Christ Jesus, who
walk not after the flesh, but after the
Spirit.” If you’re a believer, you have to
live in that truth!
Challenge #2: Dads struggle
with managing work and home
We saw the word “intentional” a lot. Dads
have a strong desire to be intentional in
how they allocate their time on various
family activities (from sports to devotions),
where they draw lines (dating, technology),
and in loving their wives to set a good example for their children.
The way one dad said it was, “The decision between good-better-best is the dilemma. That is my single biggest challenge as a
father right now.”
The Top Three
(and How to Fix Them)
By Ryan Sanders
We want to fight the feelings of failure and help dads lead as God intended.